Nothing.

Here’s how a typical day goes for me…

Wake up @ 5:30am. (Why so early? I wake my teenager up @ 6am and I’d like at least a few minutes of quiet to myself.) Wake the teenager @ 6am. 6:15am – is he up? Do I hear the water running in the shower? The next 45 minutes can go either really smoothly or bring ensuing chaos. I just never really know.

When the teenager is out the door, I have another 15 minutes before waking up the young diva of the house. From there you can bet that the morning will be interesting & this mom has to be ready for whatever happens, even though what that might be is anyone’s guess. We might find only one shoe or decide to try a new look with our wardrobe or paint our nails all different colors… Yes, this is real.

After dropping the young diva off at Pre-K, I go to work. Full time. All day. In an office with only 2 men and about 15 women where we do the work of a staff twice that size. We are pretty darn amazing, if I do say so.

I come home and return to mommy-mode. Cook dinner (let’s hope I took out something this morning to thaw), negotiate bath times (yes, it’s always a negotiation. Even though it’s at the same time each night, there is negotiating involved), spend some family time with the kids (this often includes art or a dance party or playing dolls), clean/put away food and dishes from dinner, and get things ready to do it all over again the next day. Is it bedtime yet?

Did I forget to mention that there is probably one trip to the grocery store and my named being called 100 times mixed in there, too? Are you tired of reading this? Just imagine how I feel living it….

69263c14f9de11e1adc122000a1de653_7

Nothing. At the end of most days, that is what I have to give.

So ask me how and why I sit here at this computer when all of this is done and pour out words onto a page and live my passion to encourage other women. I’ve had many people tell me, “I don’t know how you do it on your own.” And the answer is simple – I don’t. It’s all Him.

Nothing you see is of my own doing. Most days I’m just trying to survive my noise and not mess up the task of raising two people. All of the things I get right are to His credit. I’m just willing to let Him do the work.

What do you have to do and be for God to use your story? Nothing. You have to lay it all down and ask Him to pick it up. If you’re like me, feeling like you’ve got nothing left inside to offer, then you are in the perfect spot!

STOP.

5-minute-friday-1

Each Friday, I join a great group of writers for a virtual flash mob of sorts. Check it out!

Stuck In a Time Warp

school cafeteria seats

There are some days that I feel like I’m back in middle school.

Unsure, awkward, buying into the he-said-she-said, wanting nothing more than to belong. It seems like in the very times when things are going my way, those old familiar feelings come back. Do you ever feel that way?

Community and relationships can be tricky to navigate through. On one hand, my heart longs for community and, on the other hand, I am scared to death of the risk. The risk that comes from being myself – real and vulnerable. Like walking into the cafeteria & spotting a seat at the “cool table”. You want to sit down more than anything, but hesitate at the risk of rejection & embarrassment. And, after you’ve sat down & felt pretty good about the situation, finding out you were the topic of conversation will just put you over the edge.

Isn’t it funny how those seemingly juvenile emotions creep their way into our adult lives? I don’t know about you, but those are the days that make me want to come home, close the door, and not attempt to reach out to another person ever again.

But, in my heart, I know that is not how God intends for things to be. There is great risk in being the bigger person. It’s not a safe zone. It’s a certainty that people will hurt & disappoint us. It’s part of our fallible human nature. But even in that risky place, we can find security in knowing that our hearts are in His hands.

God calls us to take risks, and those come in all shapes and sizes. As He stretches us and changes our hearts, we’re going to be called out of our comfort zones. For me, that means not reacting to the world around me when it gets uncomfortable. Maybe for you it’s something different – standing up for your beliefs, starting a new career, letting go of old habits.

In a world of ‘maybe’, ‘might’, ‘should-be’ and ‘could-be’, there is One thing that you can trust in enough to build your life upon. You are safe and secure in His everlasting arms. Whatever this world & the people in it throw at you, He will be holding you up and never letting you down.